The Power of Community: Mental Health & Emotional Support for Breast Cancer Patients

(Tina Dawn/ VM Med) — It’s important to know how to be supportive during a breast cancer diagnosis, treatment and recovery. Here are ways you can support your loved one.

A breast cancer diagnosis is life-changing. One shouldn’t underestimate the emotional impact of suddenly facing a serious disease and how scary that can be, both for the person receiving the diagnosis and for their loved ones.

It’s normal to experience a wide range of emotions; from depression, anxiety, denial and shock, to anger, sadness, and fear. Many breast cancer patients also experience feeling completely alone despite the support around them. That sentiment is only amplified for young breast cancer patients, who find themselves with stalled life plans as they fight a disease, while their friends and acquaintances are focusing on careers and starting families.

While everyone reacts differently to being given bad news, “going through many emotions is a normal part of having cancer, whether you’ve just been diagnosed, finished treatment or found out that cancer has come back,” says the Canadian Cancer Society. “Many describe this as being on an emotional roller coaster.”

How to Support a Loved One Diagnosed with Breast Cancer

When someone we care about tells us that they have cancer, it can be hard to know what to say. Whether you’re a partner, a family member, or a friend, it’s important to find ways to show up for them through words and actions.

People can sometimes feel awkward or invasive asking questions about a breast cancer patient’s diagnosis and treatment. They might not know what to say or how to act. Here are a few suggestions on how to provide mental, health and emotional support.

Focus on the day-to-day tasks. “What do you need from me today? How are you feeling?” Cook a meal for them. Offer them a ride to an appointment. Take care of any household chores that may be adding to their stress.

Allow your loved one a chance to talk through their emotions. Don’t minimize their fears in an effort to remain upbeat and positive or try to “fix” things. There’s certainly a place for positivity, but people going through difficult times often just need a sounding board, someone to listen.

Unless someone specifically asks for your opinion or suggestion on treatments, don’t offer unsolicited advice. Breast cancer patients already have a medical team taking care of them and have probably already heard most of what you are about to say. Let their doctors take care of their treatment and focus on being their friend or partner.

If you’re a long-term breast cancer caregiver, it’s equally important to take care of yourself so you don’t burn out. You can’t offer support if you physically and mentally exhaust yourself.

How to Support a Patient With a Changing Appearance 

For many women diagnosed with and treated for breast cancer, one of the most emotionally draining and traumatic experiences is losing their hair.

Although the way we look can be a big part of our identity, hair loss during breast cancer treatment has little to do with vanity. Hair loss is often the signifier for radical transformation. It forces the patient to see the visual representation of the situation. Breast cancer patients who are struggling with the diagnosis can no longer pretend everything is normal.

Coping with the stress of a coming mastectomy or lumpectomy, or even with the post-treatment stress of upcoming mammograms, is where the presence of a continued support system becomes invaluable.

Be mindful of a breast cancer patient’s emotions as their appearance changes. It isn’t an easy thing to experience, and it’s more challenging for some than for others. The loss of one or both breasts, surgery scars, weight changes, and hair loss from chemotherapy can be hard to experience. Offer tips for a healthier body image that can help people through these changes.

Coping With the Side Effects of Treatment

Breast cancer treatments can affect the body in physical, emotional, cognitive and even financial ways.

Brain fog, fatigue, confusion, and memory lapses are all common side effects of chemotherapy. Add to that lack of sleep, anxiety and stress of the diagnosis, it’s not easy coping with it all. Knowing what to expect can make handling any of this easier.

Breast cancer caregivers are urged to follow the patient’s lead and provide support and opportunities for relaxation and peace without pushing too hard. Setting realistic and attainable goals for physical exercise and socialization is good and will help lower stress levels.

A support group is key. Meeting with people experiencing the same fears and concerns can alleviate negative feelings and provide a sense of much-needed community.

Just Be There For Them

When you see your loved one going through this difficult period, dealing with both the physical discomfort and the stress and anxiety of a cancer diagnosis, you may find yourself at times at a loss for words. Uncertain of what the best approach is. Remember that your presence and all the many ways you show support at a time like this are all that really matter. There is no perfect way to show up for someone. Different patients want (or don’t want) different things from their support group. Just be there.

Being diagnosed with breast cancer can be a challenging time. Both for the person given the diagnosis, and the people in their lives. It’s not easy being the partner, parent, child, or friend of someone undergoing cancer treatments. Being a breast cancer caregiver requires physical and emotional stamina, as well as the willingness to handle a wide range of emotions the patient might be experiencing.

If you’re the one going through breast cancer diagnosis and treatment, don’t do it alone. Be prepared to lean on your support network and don’t be shy about asking for help. Don’t hesitate to reach out for professional help if you find that you need it.

As much as friends and family love you, they’re not always equipped to handle the emotions and worries you may be consumed by. Your healthcare team is in a position to steer you in the right direction for additional support. Many easily accessible and free resources are available during the entire process, as well as any long-term follow-up you may need.

VM Med’s Breast Center

VM Med’s Breast Centre is dedicated to caring for every aspect of our patients’ breast health needs.

As the largest private breast center in Canada and an internationally recognized leader in breast cancer prevention, detection, diagnosis, and treatment, our specialists conduct comprehensive exams, including imaging exams and biopsies, within our multidisciplinary clinic. These exams can be conducted in a single, time-saving visit.

Our team of experts assesses each case of breast cancer and works with you to create a personalized course of treatment that prioritizes your health and comfort throughout this process.

Our services include breast imaging, breast biopsy, breast surgery, breast cancer staging, breast oncology, and breast cancer genetic testing.

For more information on your screening, you can read our extensive archive of VM Med blogs, including Breast Cancer in Younger Women: What You Need to Know and How to Perform a Breast Self-Examination.

Still have questions? Book a consultation with our experts.